刮痧

  I have heard of this movie for many times since I seen it last week. Till now, I am still confused by the concept that “difference and discrimination “, which are conveyed by this movie. There are so many cultural gaps shown in this movie. Ways of child education, value of friendship and concept of familial affection, all of these Chinese traditions torture Da Tong, the leading role of this film, and his family during their assimilation into American culture. All the disasters are triggered by a Chinese traditional medical treatment－Gua Sha. Because of a awful scar on Dennis’(Da Tong’s son) back left by Gua Sha, the child protecting organization accuses Da Tong with child abuse and Da Tong is deprived of the custody right, then the whole family go divided.
  
  Most people regard Da Tong’s family tragedy as misunderstand resulted from cultural difference. However, I have another peep on it. I have to say I was shocked by the scar at the first sight since I haven’t known about Gua Sha either, but as soon as I know that it’s really a tradition treatment, I rest assure my worry. I can sympathize the American’s shock caused by the horrific scar and accept their legal action at the very beginning, which is the only thing can be regard as cultural difference in my point of view. Nevertheless what they do after their initial action is motivated by racial discrimination rather than cultural difference, which I have to point out. I have several reasons for this.
  
  Firstly, after the first hearing, they can know that how much Da Tong care about his son and get a brief idea about Gua Sha. I am even quite outraged about the American civil servants’ scrimshank when they bring an accusation against Da Tong to deprive his custody right. The most important point Da Tong pose on the hearing is Gua Sha treatment, but they seem to “forget” it that maybe the main cause of that scar since I haven’t seen they do any research on GuaSha in their following investigation.

  Secondly, When it comes to finding witness, the witnesses they find are Da Tong’s boss and janitor and even the midwife. How ridiculous is that! I mean the witnesses they find have seldom or even never talked to Dennis. How do they know or they sure about the relation between Da Tong and his son Dennis? If I am the investigator, I would find Dennis’ teachers as witness cause the time they spend with this child is only less than his parents.
   
  Last but not the least, they totally “forget” the “victim” of this case. Although I don’t familiar with US law, I suppose Dennis’ opinion in this case should be taken into account which maybe a most valuable one since he is the very person who knows what happens to himself most. In private or public, they should inquire the child himself about the situation goes on him. Regretfully, I haven’t ever seen them do so .
  
  To conclude, this series of matter was mostly caused by racial discrimination rather than cultural difference, I finally confirm.

  PS: This article was written in one year ago for my "English Culture Class". Hope to find someone to share a view on it.

   When a member of one culture produces a message for consumption by a member of another culture, intercultural communication occurs, which is a kind of communication between people whose cultural perceptions and symbol systems are distinctive enough to alter the communication event. People are alike and different. We carry our culture with us wherever we go, and it influences how we respond to the people we meet.
   The leading man in the movie Gua Sha Treatment has been in America for eight years as a new immigrant. At the beginning of this movie, the man, Datong addressed a speech in American way to show his love to America and American dream. It seemed that he has gained great success in the American mainstream society. Yet it was just an exaggeration of his success when used to make the comparison with the ensuing events.
   Datong and his wife were born and raised in China, while their son was a Chinese American. They taught their son in American way and spoke English all the time. In the celebration, we can find Datong was praised and encouraged by his boss, who can be taken as a representative of the mainstream business. At the party, because of the quarrel between the two children, the son, Dennis was beaten by his father, which is just a very common action in Chinese culture. The grandfather of Dennis also admitted the way of education. Because the other boy is the son of his boss, Datong gave his son a lesson to show his respect to the boss, who can not understand it at all. The boss was shocked and accepted it temporarily. In American culture, individualism is the key point of American cultural pattern, even between the father and the son. But in Chinese cultural pattern, fathers have the right or responsibility to educate the sons, no matter in a legal way or his personal way. We tend to take it as family privacy, instead of family violence or child abuse. In traditional Chinese culture, family conflict is often solved between family members and it’s a shame to spread family conflict outside of the house, while in America, the law and regulations make the difference.
   There was a very plain role in this movie, Lao Huo, the man who acted terra-cotta warrior, which was a loser in pursuing American dream compared with Datong. There were only the daily life and death of Lao Huo in this movie, which reflected the pursuit and struggling of an ordinary person in America. The death of him made the father of Datong think a lot, which was a clue to tell us the old man will return to China finally. According to the two different results of pursuing American dream, two different result of cultural conflict revealed.
   After the Gua Sha treatment rendered by the grandfather, Datong and his wife accepted it because of their Chinese culture background and the previous experience. It’s natural for the couple to keep the accident of child abuse secret to their father. And Datong confessed it was he who gave the treatment to the child, although his wife showed a little reluctance and hesitance. Actually his father gave the Gua Sha treatment to the son. There was an obvious culture difference in the episode. Chinese people behave on the basis of experience, while American act with the reference to the specific evidence. It’s praiseworthy for Datong to be a scapegoat for his father. In Chinese traditional culture, the law is important but sometimes affection counts. It’s dutiful and responsible to reduce the pains of parents both in China and America. If Datong admitted his father gave the treatment to the child and his to father will be accused by the court. Although it’s lawful, it’s unfilial in Chinese culture, which is an unforgivable fault.
Chinese view on interpersonal relationship network has been illustrated richly in this movie. When Datong needed a lawyer to help him, he sought help of his friend, who is actually not a lawyer of family law, but copyright law. Because of the lack of legal knowledge and the good relationship between them, Datong insisted on his help. Before the hearing commenced, Datong’s wife asked why the court was not the same as she saw before on TV. The tiny episode accounted for the difference between the judicial systems. Because Datong was in trouble, he turned to his friend for help, regardless of his professional field. Chinese weak legal consciousness was also criticized and satirized in this movie and Datong’s family became victims of culture shock.
   Although Gua Sha treatment is common and effective in China, we never tried to understand how it worked. We learned our culture from folk tales, mass media, and education. Culture is transmitted from generation to generation, so we never question the therapy. Everyone is a product of his own culture, it’s undoubted for American to have nothing idea about the treatment. But we can also find strong prejudice and ethnocentrism of America in the response to the case.
   The trial of this child abuse case could be regarded as the climax of this film. Datong’s family fights against the charge, which is an intense conflict between the Chinese and American cultures. Traditional medical treatment cannot be proved and admitted. They have no interest in proving why Gua Sha treatment is advisable but tried to prove how much the couple loves their son. The judgment and condemnation are just based on the scratch, the judge never showed a fair and sensible attitude to the medical treatment. Chinese classical book Journey to the West is considered from the negative perspective, even though the accuser knew it was wrong. The malicious and deliberated objection described American competition and materialism. The aim of the dispute is just for the victory in the court, regardless of the wicked ways. The prejudice and discrimination are two apparent obstacles in the intercultural communication. Moreover, the ethnocentrism of America was also perceivable. The judge and the accuser never showed justice to Datong’s rebuttal. Because of the ignorance of the treatment, they were very indifferent and pride to Datong’s statement. This uncooperative attitude made this event worse. It seems all of them are well-educated and civilized, but the communication problems repeatedly arose. Both of the parties held respective strong cultural background and different values, which have implemented enormous impact.
   Additionally, the stereotyping to Chinese or easterners are mentionable. When Datong said he hit his son to save his boss’ face, to make him feel better. The boss felt it was twisted and absurd. When Datong said it was a common sense to save his wife rather than the child, the female accuser said, your Orientals are barbarian. Stereotypes were a means of organizing our images into fixed and simple categories that we use to stand for the entire collection of people. In most distances, stereotypes are the products of limited, lazy, and misguided perceptions. In the movie, some Americans never delete their confirmation bias and tend to put Chinese to shame. Then, the failure in intercultural communication occurs.
   According to Hall’s high-context and low-context communication, the Asian mode of communication is often indirect and implicit, whereas western communication tends to be direct and explicit-that is, everything needs to be stated. Westerners are more prone to making very explicit statements and have little capability with nonverbal forms of expression. High-context cultures tend to be more aware of their surroundings and their environment and do not rely on verbal communication as their main information channel. According to the analysis of the movie, we can find the difference between high-context and low-context communication. At the beginning, Datong’s wife disliked the grandfather’s smoking, but she said nothing directly and opened the window. Certainly the grandfather understood it easily. On the contrary, Americans often get permission first. And if they want to show the objection, they spoke it out. But it’s not impolite and respectful to ask the elder not to do something. When Chinese show their anger, it is also implicit. Datong was very angry to his boss, because he has thought his boss would help him on this issue. Datong hoped his boss to support him, but the fact that the boss told everything straightforward, which was unfavorable to Datong. In Datong’s view, they were friends and it’s responsible for the boss to help him and he took the frankness of his boss as a kind of betrayal. He was unwilling to work there any more and planned to quit that job after no discussion with his boss. It’s normal to a Chinese man to show his anger and express their spilt relationship. From the perspective of the American, it has nothing to do with their friendship. It’s reasonable and lawful to tell the judge all the truth. They don’t show personal emotions in the business and persuaded Datong to work, which is a way to show his kindness and concern.
The ending of this movie is happy and warm. The boss understood Gua Sha treatment and Datong’s family gained reunion on the important western festival. No matter in East or West, family reunion and family love are enjoyable and happy. In the end, the grandfather educated and taught his son again. It was warm and moving because we can feel the father’s love; no matter he expressed his love explicitly or implicitly. The grandfather left America because he found it was troublesome and upset for a person like him to live in the Western culture. It was a failure for an elderly like him in intercultural communication, and it was a success for the young generation in America.
   The last episode in the movie was the boy’s learning mandarin, which was a strong contrast to the beginning of the movie, where the boy was educated to speak English to prepare for the competition of the future. No culture is more advanced than others and cultural diversity should be advocated and protected. Human brain is an open system and supposed to appreciate the diversity.
Finally, the name of the leading man in this movie, “Datong”, is also a Chinese Confucian classical term, which means great harmony. Obviously, the name was created with the implied meaning. “Datong” society is the perfect and ideal society in Confucianism, which conveyed the hope and wish of the movie producers. Although there are so many different countries, cultures, systems, races, etc, it’s a pursuit to build such kind of harmonious society without discrimination, prejudice, conflict, war…

       电影《刮痧》可谓是一段由刮痧引发的虐童事件纠纷。因为刮痧所导致的背部伤痕引起美国医院对一个五岁的小男孩丹丹的生活产生关注，以此开始怀疑其父亲是否对其有虐待倾向，而导致原本幸福的一家四口骤然分离。在中国观众看来，这场发生在美国华人身上的纠纷实在是荒谬，后续的一些列措施和争辩都是多余。但为何一个出于爱而做出的刮痧行为会引起如此大的纷争？影片以此为契机，试图为我们展示生活中不可避免的中西方文化冲突。
     影片中的爷爷形象正好是中国普通大众的代表，他的一言一行都体现着中国传统文化习俗和普通群众的生活习惯。影片矛盾在爷爷对孙子的一次刮痧中开始，也在爷孙二人分离时父子两人逃跑中走向高潮。诚如电影中的一句台词“我在中国也是一个高级知识分子，但来了美国，我却是又聋又哑，只剩一双眼睛，还能四处看看”，诚恳真挚，一语中的，这正好道出了无数初来美国的中国老年人的心声：茫然，不适应，找不到共同语言，缺少一个说说话的朋友。这种格格不入首先来自于语言的障碍，当一个活了六七十岁的人什么话也说不出什么话也听不懂时，不只是交流上的无助，更是内心的一种彷徨。当孙子流利地用中文说出“筷子”时，看得出老人的开心，这应该就是一种说着中国话的轻松吧。由于生活坏境的改变而导致的身边没有熟悉的朋友也是一种不可避免的失落。公共场合在众多说着英文的外国人之间穿梭本就不是件让人兴奋的事，恰在这不兴奋之际遇见一位多年未见的中国老乡却实在是一件让人振奋的事。本以为独在异乡的现状出现了一丝曙光，朋友心脏病发骤然离世的苦痛却意外降临，伤心之余影片的矛盾冲突也拉开帷幕：那一夜许大同独留儿子一人在家引起的事端足以另这个家庭崩溃。老友已逝，好心办了坏事，当这种由文化差异导致的冲突上升到影响孙子和儿子时，老人的回国也许是最好的选择。虽要面对一个人的生活，但在美国有家人相伴仍少不了孤苦，回家才能算是真正释放自己。因为那有一片生他养他的土地，更有一群跟他志同道合的朋友。做人要有出息，逃避只是逞一时之快，机场分别时老人骂醒儿子的那一番话也让这个人物形象更加饱满。做父母的哪个不希望儿孙幸福，他们的安康才是父母最大的幸福。
    听证会上原被告双方的争论正是中西文化冲突的最好体现。在第一场听证会上，许大同不顾好友律师的劝说以其是他最好的朋友兼老板为由执意邀请一个不懂家庭法的律师来为自己辩护，这在其美国朋友眼中本就不是明智的选择。许大同以为的胜利在对方提供的事实证据面前完全苍白无力，当刮痧导致的背部伤痕成为指控其虐待儿子的证据时，尽管他再怎么费力解释刮痧是中国的合法医疗方法，但在美国这种行为却是非法和不被理解的。在没有一个专业的中西医学家来正确解释刮痧的原理之前，存在于事实至上的可见伤痕就是最有效的控诉。为何刮痧的是别人而许大同却一定承认是自己，甚至不许妻子说出事实，影片给了我们这样的解答：因为他是中国人。在中国人的道德观和价值观里，百善孝为先，儿子为维护父亲说一些善意的谎言是最天经地义不过的了。
    由于第一场听证会上对方律师未在之前提供证据副本，加上本方律师受委托的特殊化，因此拉开第二场听证会的高潮。从官方对待此次事件的态度可看出美国司法制度的优越性和对程序正当的重视度，这也直接反映出中西法治文化的差异。“用证据说话”是听证会的宗旨，而这场听证会上出现的多个人证物证恰好是对中西方文化冲突的最好诠释。第一，公寓门卫提供的许大同夜晚独留孩子一人在家的证词。在中国文化里这完全属于每个家庭的内部管理事宜，不涉及他人和官方的利益，更谈不上司法程序的介入；但在美国，不论在情理层面上是出于什么可被宽宥的理由，也无法改变其恶劣的性质。第二，医院医生提供的许大同在妻子分娩当日未及时出现的证词。同样的道理，一个在中国被认为再正常不过的行为在美国却成为对方控诉许大同不爱自己孩子的理由，甚至以“保大人不保小孩”的正常选择怀疑一个父亲对儿子降临的期盼。第三，许大同朋友提供的他在公共场合动手打儿子的证词。俩小孩打架，美国家长会认为小孩打架实属正常，父母可以教育但却谈不上人前动手。而中国父母总会不分对错的责备自己的孩子，就像影片中的许大同所言：他打孩子是为了在公众场合给对方父母留面子。就是这样的面子文化在其朋友眼中却是不可理喻的中国式逻辑。第四，由许大同开发的游戏和《西游记》引起的对其道德观的怀疑。对方律师对孙悟空的亵渎和游戏英雄的暴力批判直接导致了许大同听证会上的暴跳如雷，不只在他眼中，在大多数中国人眼中，孙悟空和其他的民族英雄一样，代表的是中国文化的正义和顽强的力量。中国人喜欢把传统文化中的英雄人物画面化，应用于各个领域以传播这种英雄气节，这种对于文化的传承在美国民众看来却是对暴力的宣传，影片中的大众游行足以说明这点。从许大同给儿子将孙悟空的故事，到儿子时时抱着的猴子布偶，一直到最后的圣诞节礼物，影片的这一设置无疑不是许大同这类美国华人对中国文化的信仰和其道德观和价值观的体现。一切以“证据说话”开始，也以“证据不足”无法证明刮痧的合法结束，最后丹丹由儿童福利局监护的决定也是中西文化冲突得不到调节的必然结果。
    单就影片的艺术性质而言，这不失为一部好电影。“父亲爱儿子，天经地义，还用得着找证据，发表声明吗？”可是一段感人肺腑的自述在美国还是抵不过四个字“证据说话”。一场由刮痧引起的纠纷，导致一个美国华人家庭的悲剧：夫妻辞职分居、父亲回国、儿子被迫分离，也是这场纷争展现了美国华人的生活背景和中美文化冲突。但在不断地冲突矛盾中，爱也是永恒的主题。爷爷对孙子的爱，妻子对丈夫的爱，父母对儿子的爱，尽管无声无息，却也感人不已。就像中国人喜欢大团圆，影片也不置可否地在最后以爱收尾。在圣诞夜这样欢快的日子，父亲给了儿子一个回家的承诺。所以即使被打劫，被拒之门外，却也用爱的力量攀上了一个难以超越的高度，最后一家三口抱头痛哭的欢乐无疑是圣诞夜最美的礼物。影片最后丹丹自述：中国、长城、黄河、长江，虽生在美国，但我却喜欢他们跟我说中国的故事。对于中西方文化冲突，我们值得反思，也值得更多的文化交流与合作。

  《刮痧》里面，妻子很委屈得问丈夫：“为什么是我们遇上这种事？”丈夫无言……其实答案很简单也很复杂。

  

   最近常问自己这个问题，也常常感叹时间的力量。以前就很喜欢史铁生先生，高中课本里面选到了那片大名鼎鼎的《我与地坛》，那时候很小，不能读透里面的真情和哲理(虽然先扎起还是不懂)。3年后，我大一进了学校，在《大学语文》里又选了这篇散文。原来好的作品是可以读一辈子的。再两年，现在的我又和以前不同了，最起码背上和肩上多了一块又丑又令人难受的疤痕。女生的心态很奇妙，她们会因为身体某个部位的变化而引起心理上巨大的波澜。从成都回重庆，拖着很疲惫的身子，我问：“为什么是我？”精神的痛苦让我从时间里去淡忘此刻，而我知道这一切不过只是暂时的麻醉。可惜这痛苦不是一句简单的“振作！”可以解决的。

   可奇怪的是，明明需要帮助，但我还是会狠狠的推开身边关心自己的人，宁愿选择一个人面对。为什么这样，不是因为不好意思，也不是因为心灵的紧闭，而是因为身边人的存在老是提醒自己，你是不一样的。这痛会被一次次的唤醒，让人难受。所以明知道会伤害，但是我还是拒绝了别人的关怀。

     在这里谈到了爱的方法。《刮痧》里面，法庭要父亲证明他对儿子的爱。爱也需要证据！很好笑。但是人家就是要你证明，因为西方是一个讲究证据的法制。但是爱如何证明？父亲的愤怒让人唏嘘，他护送孩子回福利院，让人恍惚间读出了主人公知其不可为而为之的勇气和决心。父亲的证明是用时间堆出来的，法律没法丈量。只有人心可以互通这样真情。

   妻子问：“为什么我们会遇到这种事情?”谁也不知道答案。时间会消化这样哀怨的问题加叹息，让人忘记去追根究底。而也只有时间能让人的真情洗净铅华，寻找到痛苦的释放点。

  一叹到底，谁解我心，你明白了吗？

基本上，剧情不太合理。梁家辉作为一个到美国生活了这么长时间的人，连不能够打孩子这么一点基本意识都没有吗？到了法庭上，本来几个词可以说清楚的事情，Chinese alternative therapy/massage，就是不说，光知道发脾气。如果不是有一个超级负责人的法官，这局面怎么收拾得了。要表现文化冲突也要合理一点才好啊。